Top Ten Cloves: Ways Harry Reid and Democrats can keep Roland Burris from taking Senate seat

By J. Thomas Duffy

News Item: If The Senate Democrats Accept Lieberman, Why Not Burris?

10. Since he'll be in Washington, have Rick Warren bring along his "Cone of Silence" and issue that to Burris, as his office

9. Have a debate, between Burris and Caroline Kennedy, winner take all

8. Taking a cue from Obama, Harry Reid can say they are going to text Burris the info on getting into the Senate

7. Tell Burris that, if he comes to the Senate, he'll be the first one Michele Bachmann will have investigated

6. All they have to do is say that Chuck Norris is thinking about taking the seat and the controversy is all over

5. Ring the Congress with the Arizona Minutemen

4. Get Todd Kobus, who tackled Patriots linebacker Junior Seau, to line up Burris as he goes to enter the Senate

3. Shame him - Get Zbigniew Brzezinski to say to Burris, and Blagojevich, "You have a such stunningly superficial knowledge of what went on it's almost embarrassing to listen to you."

2. They can throw their shoes at him, until he gets the hint

1. Inform Burris that they lost the Senate seat in the Bernie Madoff Scandal


Bonus Burris-Blagojevich Hijinks

Deb Cupples: Blagojevic Shoots U.S. Senate the Bird

Attytood: Between Barack and a hard place: Blago picks a senator

Think Progress: Former U.S. Atty: Blagojevich appointment shows he’s ‘crazy like a fox,’ playing to future black jurors

Nate Silver: Reid Has Few Ways to Block Burris Appointment




(Cross Posted at The Garlic)

Top Ten Cloves: Tricky things about attempting to sell a Senate seat

By J. Thomas Duffy

News Item: Obama: I Am ‘Appalled And Disappointed’ By Illinois Scandal, Blagojevich Needs To Resign

10. Try to move it quickly ... Just remember Andy Card's warning - "From a marketing point of view, you don't introduce a new Senate Seat in August."

9. Get it placed in a few movies, or television shows, and people will line up to buy it like Happy Soup!

8. Ticket brokers, but you have to be careful of the various states that have "scalping" laws.

7. Talk to Sarah Palin, cut her in, and maybe you can package it with the Bridge to Nowhere.

6. Two words - Time Share!

5. If you're willing to put "GoldenPalace.Com" on it, you could get millions!

4. You could get Billy Mays, butit's a tougher sell if the seat doesn't mend something.

3. eBay, but it probably would sell faster if it had an image of the Virgin Mary with it.

2. Holy Cow! ... Too bad Phil Rizzuto died ... Think of the potential - "Hi, I'm Phil Rizzuto, from the Senate Seat Store" ... You could have sold it like hotcakes!

1. SenateSeat! ... Apply directly to Rod Blagojevich! ... SenateSeat! ... Apply directly to Rod Blagojevich! ... SenateSeat! ... Apply directly to Rod Blagojevich! ...

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Bonus Blago's Bazaar Riffs

Josh Marshall: Amazing

Robert Stein: Selling Obama's Senate Seat

Steve Benen: THE INEVITABLE PUSH

Nate Silver: Appointed Senators Rarely Win Re-Election

Rex W. Huppke: Rod Blagojevich shows foulmouthed side ...Etiquette experts say such language still unprofessional

Prescott Carlson: Bla-lego-vich








(Cross-posted at The Garlic.)