Conversation starters

By Creature

Suppose you come face to face with Chris Matthews at a bar this evening. Suppose he proceeds to lecture you on the greatness of his favorite maverick, John McCain. Be prepared to answer this hardballer with the Shakers Guide to John McCain. Brought to you by Shakespeare's Sister, it's everything you need to know about John McCain but were afraid to remember.

Okay, if that's too far fetched, imagine this: You are heading up to Connecticut to play a round of golf with an old college buddy. You know he/she leans right and likes Joe. You don't want to seem out-of-touch with the big primary only a day or so away. What's a potential Tiger Woods to do? Never fear, the Carpetbagger is here. The man who belongs to no state takes you on a tour of the talk surrounding Tuesday's anti-war vote. Don't step on the green without it.

Fine, you don't drink. You don't play golf. Maybe tonight you'll be staying home, in your mom's basement, plotting the destruction of mankind. You need a plan and you are looking for a few good friends in government to help you out. Have I got a bunch of nuts for you. It's Salon you'll need to turn to for this pinky plan. Watch the commercial, it's worth the price of admission, for this neo-con war plan is anything but a clean break.

(Cross-posted at State of the Day.)