Sign of the Apocalypse #50: The Beckhams

By Michael J.W. Stickings

SOTA #49 was the Spice Girls reunion. But let's get a bit more focused here with #50.

David may be one of the more overrated athletes in the world, and was so even at his peak, but at least he has some talent and, it would seem, some passion for what he does. A long-time fan of the English national soccer team, as I am (because Canada is pretty lousy), cannot entirely despise him.

But Victoria -- she seems to have neither talent nor passion. Her sole purpose seems to be to seek the attention of the celebrity media, and even this she does poorly, largely because there is nothing there even for the gawkers. Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan at least make it into rehab, Paris Hilton into jail. One can (almost) respect such banal delinquency.

But Victoria -- she makes Jessica Simpson look like a Nobel laureate. Her look is dazed, vacant. She's the one Spice Girl who never had so much as a brief solo within a song (correct me if I'm wrong). And have you ever heard her speak? Her celebrity status now depends entirely on her connection to Girl Power, of which she was the dim fifth wheel, and on her marriage to an overrated soccer player who left genuinely competitive soccer in Madrid, where it was clear that he was no longer good enough to play among the European elite, to be the big fish in L.A., where the mediocrity of the MLS might allow him to prolong his career and where he might still benefit from his overhyped celebrity status.

And so we have SOTA #50. Not just the Beckhams but specifically Victoria Beckham and the celebrity of the Beckhams, the Beckham show, as well as those who buy into it.

Photo from the Globe: "Los Angeles Galaxy's David Beckham waves beside his wife Victoria at a party at the Museum of Contemporary Art in Los Angeles on Sunday."