Researchers discover a future home for humanity

By Michael J.W. Stickings

Well, we're fucking up our own planet so badly, maybe we can move here if we don't first destroy ourselves along with it:

Astronomers may have identified one of the richest planetary systems yet.

The discovery of a seventh planet around the dwarf star KIC 11442793 could be a record, according to two separate teams of researchers.

The system bears some similarities to our own, but all seven planets orbit much closer to their host star, which lies some 2,500 light-years from Earth.

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The new planet is the fifth furthest from its parent star, orbiting with a period of nearly 125 days.

With a radius of 2.8 times that of the Earth, it fits into a family that now includes two roughly Earth sized worlds, three "super-Earths" and two larger bodies.

Perfect. Set the controls to Warp Factor 9.2, minimum.