Miley Cyrus takes on Radiohead

By Michael J.W. Stickings

This is just stupid. But, then, it's Miley Cyrus we're talking about:

When Radiohead refused to meet Miley Cyrus and Kanye West at the Grammy Awards last month, the starlet threatened to "ruin" them and the rapper refused to stand for their performance. Now, the In Rainbows band is fighting back.

Cyrus kicked off the feudin' during an appearance on the Johnjay & Ray radio show and rambled on for more than six minutes about how the band dissed her after she begged her manager to set up an introduction.

"I'm like, these are the people I really want to meet," she said. "I'd freak out. They're my rock gods. These are the only people that I would cry over... My manager asked and said, 'Miley's really obsessed.' And they were like, 'We don't really do that.'"

She continued on in disbelief about the Thom Yorke band's lack of interest in meeting the Hannah Montana, admitting she was so disappointed about the diss, she left the show early.

"I left 'cause I was so upset," she said. "I wasn't going to watch. Stinkin' Radiohead! I'm gonna ruin them, I'm going to tell everyone."

The three-time Grammy winners responded by putting the teen in her place...

"When Miley grows up, she'll learn not to have such a sense of entitlement," the quintet said in a statement.

First, who the hell are Johnjay and Ray?

Second, Miley has "rock gods"? She's "obsessed" with Radiohead. Really. -- She's about as shallow as a sheet of phyllo dough, an artificial, manufactured Disney star. And her dad's Billy Ray. And she and her Disney media machine peddle shit to masses of young girls who don't know any better. But Radiohead is her god?

Third, she's "gonna ruin" Radiohead? How? By ordering 8-year old girls not to buy OK Computer?

Fourth, she's "going to tell everyone"? Tell everyone what? That one of the greatest rock bands ever didn't want to meet Hannah Montana? That she's entitled to meet her gods, and that it's major slight when they refuse? Yeah, I'm sure Thom Yorke and the boys are terrified.

Miley Cyrus taking on Radiohead is like Creature and me talking on Kobe and LeBron in a game of 2-on-2.

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Yes, in case you were wondering, the popularity of Miley Cyrus is indeed a Sign of the Apocalypse. For us, it's #64.

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In related news, Billy Ray thinks he's bigger than The Beatles. No, not really, but who know what egotism lurks in the self-absorbed bubble of the Cyrus family?

In more related news, David Gilmour and Roger Waters are my "rock gods." Seriously. I'll be really, really upset if I don't meet them. Can anyone make that happen? Anyone? I mean it.

If not, I'll ruin them! Ruin them, I tell you! (But why would I ever do that? They're my "rock gods," aren't they?)