Is she smarter than a 5th grader?

By Capt. Fogg

During these last few days, it's been hard to find some humor in the ongoing demise of the United States of America. A laugh or two can be a good thing on the way to the gallows.

So it's been good to have Sarah Palin around; not so much that her idiocy reminds me of the class screwup trying to bullshit his way out of being totally unprepared to answer the teacher's questions, but I'm amused on a daily basis by the desperate contortions of reality Republicans are forced into when attempting to justify her appointment. She's confident, she's a fighter, she will stand up to the good old boys, she has attitude; never mind that she shares all these things and more with a host of people from Che Guevara to Leon Trotsky. That bit of humor will of course be unobserved by those who share the belief that she's better off for not having graduated Summa cum Laude from Harvard.

The "gotcha journalism" gambit may work on an incident or two, like advocating the invasion of Pakistan or having no clue as to what the Bush Doctrine might be, but it's a bit flimsy when applied to her complete inability to name one Supreme Court case other than Roe v. Wade from more than 200 years of American history. Even that other class screwup, George Bush, was able to cite Dred Scott, albeit in a very inarticulate and somewhat inapposite way. That yet to be aired clip would be high comedy were it not so illustrative of her real mission: to spread the fundamentalist gospel and help bring on the destruction of most of mankind by Jesus in war mode. That's why it doesn't matter that she's an uninformed mediocrity: these are the last days.

A candidate for the second highest office in the US; a candidate who may well become the next president, nuclear codes and all, who thinks The Flinstones is historically accurate is so funny that it borders on horror. I suppose the hard and irrefutable proof that such is not the case could also fall under the umbrella of the Gotcha Journalism Defense, but then the American public, particularly the public that pretends she's fit for office, is far less discriminating than any elementary school teacher I can recall. Indeed most middle school teachers can expect their students to answer questions Sarah has never heard before. Perhaps the Palinists will put on serious faces and nod when Sarah tells us that the dog ate her homework this Thursday. I can't wait. I need a good laugh and I'm ready to embrace the horror.