Sunday, August 14, 2005

Designer Vaginas -- The 13th Sign of the Apocalypse?

Now here's a sure sign that the apocalypse is fast approaching. Yesterday's Globe and Mail has a feature article about the growing practice of women having plastic surgery done to their vaginas in an attempt to improve their aesthetic appeal and to "tighten" them to enhance their own and their partners' sexual pleasure. Apparently many of these women are walking into their local cosmetic surgeon's office clutching clippings from pornographic magazines depicting the ideal vagina that they would like to have, and some girls as young as fifteen are coming in with their mothers to have their vaginas altered.

Now I know that Michael has blogged about the epidemic of breast augmentation surgeries occurring these days despite the known risks posed by implants leaking, but truly that women are now feeling compelled to have the most private part of their body surgically altered, presumably to meet societal expectations of what's beautiful and what's not, is tremendously disturbing. It says something about the pervasiveness of pornography in our society and our insecurities about how we look that women today would go to such lengths to have their most intimate places "beautified." God only knows what's coming down the pipeline.

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  • Excellent stuff, Vivek. This is certainly #13. How absolutely insane? (I wonder if penile modification is available? I mean, for those who want to look like, say, Ron Jeremy.)

    By Blogger Michael J.W. Stickings, at 9:25 PM  

  • I thought the ideal vagina was any vagina that a woman was born with. I suppose the ideal penis is 12 inches long and 4 inches thick… what’s that? Oh, right, only in cyber space and porno flicks. Oh, silly me.

    I didn’t realize that happiness was gauged by the size of your manhood or the length of your labia; I really need to keep with the times, I thought happiness was gauged by the size of your, or more importantly, your spouses bank account, once again, silly me.

    Do I live in the same world as these women with designer-do your lips hang low (enough)-vaginas? What happens once you have labia reduction surgery and then the stars and moons align and you find “the one” (your knightress), only to realize he/she likes longer and thicker labia. Do you reverse the surgery? How far do you go? How important is this in the grand scheme of life? Ah, right, it’s not! Seriously, this is beyond a disturbing thought. Insecurity is one thing, plain insanity is another, and risking your clitoris’ nerve endings to be “prettier” down there, is just plain whacky. Who’s looking anyway? Generally, people (men and women) are just happy to be there.

    Smarten up designer-vagina ladies, my child, your children and other people’s children look up to you. Fifteen is much too young to worry about how beautiful or ideal a vagina is or isn’t. Children have a hard enough time growing up in today’s world; do they really need to worry about whether they have ideal, pretty and/or acceptable genitalia? And an even better question, who are these parents? Isn’t there a new law requiring individuals to pass a competency test in order to obtain a child rearing license? No? Obviously, there should be.

    Instead of accepting who we are and what we are, instead of standing up for ourselves, and loving ourselves, instead of encouraging our children to worry about more important and more valuable things in life. I suppose we should stick with the materialistic, immoral, and self-damaging outlook society has don us and keep creating insecurities and other suicidal protocols for our children to follow.

    You ask what is coming down the pipeline next. Perhaps with the aide of further technology and surgical methods we will be able to transform ourselves into a hermaphrodite-like-species with the capability of fornicating with ourselves. Sure, it may not be aesthetically appealing but it would be practical, wouldn’t it? We already live in a very selfish world, full of greed, envy, jealousy and contempt; we might as well be able to love thyself (more so). Maybe then we won’t have to agonize about beautifying our genitalia or ourselves, for someone else, for a minute longer.

    Society is in real need a of a reality check.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 1:45 AM  

  • Maybe this is a little to heavy on the adbusters, but this is just an extension of the rampant consumerism in which acquisition as the path to happiness is forced down our throats through perpetual adverising. As models become thinner and younger, the golden ring of being perfect, and therefore happy, is set ever higher. The trouble is that it is no longer an internal feeling of deprivation, but that this is translated into external judgment as well. Those who do not posess equal amounts of or equal quality of X are regarded as inferior and unlovable.
    I do think that the recent attention focused on the "weight" of the Dove girls (e.g. in People magazine) is a perfect example of how sick our society has become in this regard.
    I propose a few small actions or reactions that one can do to counter this assault:
    1) Do what you can to turn advertising off in your own life. Turn the TV off during commercials. Don't buy fashion magazines (which in my opinion are the worst offenders in terms of presenting unrealistic people).
    2) Write to the companies, magazines, television shows, etc. that advertise such ridiculous things and tell them that you do not like being presented with unrealistic, idealistic, and unattainable standards. It is amazing how responsive and sensitive(!) companies are to the written complaints and comments. You may get free schwag out of it too.
    3) Be aware of how much you are influenced by advertising and be conscious to make your own decisions on all things.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 5:50 PM  

  • And another one...asshole bleaching (whitening the pigmented area around your rosebud) is becoming more popular, especially with the porn industry. Yuck!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 1:09 PM  

  • I, for one, like this idea. My girlfriend has the ugliest vigina I have ever seen.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 3:36 PM  

  • Your right! She does!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 6:21 PM  

  • my girlfriend has a big loose hanging vagina. i find the "roastbeef" nasty.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 12:34 AM  

  • you don't deserve a "perfect" pussy anyway you ungrateful small dick fuck

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 2:36 AM  

  • I have a really big labia, is this normal? how big is urez?

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 3:30 AM  


    just take a look and feel free and sexy with big clits or big labia!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 3:59 PM  

  • I'm trying as hard as I can to be comfortable with all the parts of my body...but it is SO hard when all you see around you are women with huge tits, perfect skin, tiny pussies, hairless bodies. Please don't make any judgements about people who do feel the need to change themselves. I understand exactly where they are coming from. As for those assholes who hate their girls' vag's, you should be thanking your lucky stars you're even getting access to pussy. If I were to analyze your dick, I wonder what variety of deli meat I could compare it to. Junior sausages?

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 10:52 PM  

  • hello. I am quite young, but i too have a large inner labia. so i just wanted to say that i am ashaimed of myself, not that i am sexually active. but i cant help but being like that when ppl around are constantly talking shit on large labias. i mean, its not my choice.
    so i just wanted to ask you-
    What should or can i do about this?
    and please reply:)

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 11:22 PM  

  • To the girl above who has a big labia: Don't worry about it. Very few people will ever see it. If a guy cares that much about your labia, he's simply not worth it.

    You are more than your lips!

    Being happy with yourself means that you understand some people will not think you are perfect, but YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE PERFECT. You are a human who deserves to be loved, just like anyone else.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 12:34 PM  

  • i can't explain how amazing it is to hear people defending big labia. i am 18 and have have considered surgery several times because my labia are big. i really want to ask you men out there to vocalize your support for girls like me because most men won't. when i hear about people calling big labia things like 'meat curtains' and talking about how disgusting they are, it pushes us self conscious girls further down the road to surgery. just remember guys, when you are talking about how gross they are, a girl with big labia could be listening and let me tell you from personal experience, it is VERY hurtful and causes a lot of self hatred.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 1:17 AM  

  • By Anonymous Anonymous, at 10:35 AM  

  • This comment has been removed by the author.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 8:41 PM  

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