Thursday, November 01, 2007

Jeff Gannon Speaks! ... To The Garlic!

By J. Thomas Duffy

A minor occurance at The Garlic this week.

Monday started in quite typical fashion.

Fired up the computer, pulled up The Garlic and, lo-and-behold, there was a comment in our "Wag The FEMA" post... A big, shiny comment...

And it was from Jeff Gannon!

Could it be the same, softball-throwing Jeff Gannon? The fake-reporter-working-for-a-fake-news-organization Jeff Gannon?

It quickly passed through my mind, that, no, it couldn't be.

It had to be a fake Jeff Gannon, and that quickly turned into thinking who would want to be a fake Jeff Gannon?

Would they be longing, or plotting, to get into the White House Press Briefing Room and feed pablum to the Press Secretary (thought, the current one, Dana Perino, certainly has shown she doesn't need a plant in the audience, she does fine creating her own)? Was this fake Jeff Gannon also a hot military stud? Was this fake Jeff Gannon sitting there, day-after-day, hoping against all hope, that another covert, CIA agent would be outed, so fake Jeff Gannon could play a role in exposing their name?

Would the fake Jeff Gannon be calling themselves by a name different from their given one?

That one made me think of the Steven Wright joke, about making instant coffee in the microwave oven.

I suppose, a fake Jeff Gannon (and using a fake, fake name), could, possibly, find some work, in one of those celebrity look-alike agencies.

But that gave way to wondering if the real Jeff Gannon was a celebrity.

Infamy, certainly, the 15-minutes-of-fame thing... But does that 15-minutes in the spotlight automatically give you the title of "celebrity"?

I checked The Google, to see if I could find any requirement, standards that had to be met in order to call yourself a celebrity (and not a fake celebrity, the kind that would work for a look-alike agency).

Didn't find anything. Anybody can call themselves a celebrity, though, it's not clear that anyone else would call you one. You could probably count on some friends and family, but that's not a given.

I mean, let's be real here.

If it only takes 15 minutes to become a celebrity, Christ, the place would be crawling with them.

There'd be all kinds of celebrity news shows... Reality shows... Game shows... Probably sports and dancing shows...

Wait a minute... Scratch that...

No, it is the real Jeff Gannon ... Jump on over to The Garlic to read the rest of "Jeff Gannon Speaks! ... To The Garlic!" , including a breakdown of his comment, the real reason for his comment and Bonus Jeff Gannon Links

A great moment in softball history

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